I know you've had one of those days. The day started off well enough, other than a early rise from my littlest E. We did some school, a little cleaning, made some cookies for a cookie exchange. The whining started, a little fussing and lots of busyness. For Ethan, this kind of busy means he's not feeling right or just overly tired. From that point until now, that little boy hasn't given me peace that has lasted for more than FIVE minutes. You think I'm kidding.
Its five o'clock now and the house is a wreck, the dishes from those early morning cookies still are not done, and little E is howling and whining in the background. There was a day when I thought I had this mom thing down. Well that day is gone and this day I am losing my mind. I am not happy about that.
What does it mean for me to worship God in the midst of this? My yelling is certainly not pointing my children to a loving God. They are not learning of a Savior that is slow to anger. Do they see the inconsistency as they listen to me tell them about the God who loves them and then yell about the room I just cleaned? How do I slow my heart...to truly see my kids and not just the messes and inconvience?
Lord, I want to know you differently than I do. Help me to love with a whole heart, not keeping some back for myself.
By the way, do you think FRUIT loops count as one of the five-a-days. I think that's what I'll fix for dinner.
4 comments:
oh i'm so glad i'm not alone, i have days like that all the time. i'm just impressed at your insight and reflection. by the grace of God we will be ok.
blessings
tchuess
ps i'm summer kaurin the other missionaries from germany just before you left. :)
Oh, those days. I have them more often than I'd like to admit. (I was a much better mom before I had kids...) I know that God is working through you in ways we don't even understand, and that your children have more glimpses of His love and grace and mercy than you'll ever know.
I miss you, Paula!
1) You are preaching to my choir.
2) Is that a giant trail of toilet paper streaming behind Ethan's foot? What has he been up to, I wonder?
3)Let's pray for each other... and our little disciples.
4) Sacred Parenting is a great book.
Hi Paula,
I came by to see if I could email you some particulars on the embroidery project I did on my blog. Just email me at tamzhomeAThotmailDOTcom. Blessings, Tami
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